baofeng: (backview)
baofeng ([personal profile] baofeng) wrote in [community profile] jigokucho2022-03-12 07:44 pm

text | UN: meirenyu

[Yizhi is posting from a sock account because he's well aware that authorities come down hard on snooping around. He would encourage you to do the same, but that would be blowing his own cover, so it's gonna be up to you to figure that out.]

Hey, does anyone know what's up with the blocked-off section in the parade route? The one along the Sutoku stretch.



(ooc: feel free to threadjack and mingle around! I made this to facilitate infosharing/communication/theorizing among those investigating the Night Parade plot thread, and don't plan on replying to every thread as my character has little to share himself.)
diesuki: (276)

it's terrible but so am i so i will roll around in it like a dog in something suspicious tbh

[personal profile] diesuki 2022-03-18 11:04 am (UTC)(link)
(ooc: no worries, my Chinese is far below 5-yo level, i just have a dictionary and am not afraid to abuse it for any and all puns, whether they work or not ー( ̄~ ̄)ξ this is my only motivation for learning languages)

[That's close enough to convince Dazai he's probably got the right man, and clumsy enough that he's not too worried about this being a trap of some sort. (Not that there's any reason to assume a trap anyway, but you never know.)]

Just exploring the neighborhood a little. Nothing baaaad, I promise~

[OMG somebody stop him, please... Why yes, that was a hint at his username, after a mention of their plans. Such a subtle hint, too. Truly, he is every bit the tactical genius people keep saying he is. (Listen, it's hard to keep life interesting when you're intelligent! Sometimes you need to dumb it up on purpose.)

Dazai takes a seat next to Yizhi, because standing around is only going to attract more attention.]


Cucumbers are indeed a fine food. They're a particular kappa favorite, you know.

[Clearly not, otherwise Yizhi wouldn't be eating their bribe, but it's worth dropping that hint that Dazai is indeed the person from the network, as well as (somewhat belatedly) pointing out why he mentioned cucumbers in the first place. For what it's worth: Dazai doesn't seem too worried about the (temporary) failure of their plan. He's just lounging around, looking out over the river.]
diesuki: (094)

[personal profile] diesuki 2022-03-20 07:18 pm (UTC)(link)
(OOC: Braver or stupider? That is the question. But bad puns are like 90% of my reason to learn languages, so I'm pleased it worked. 💛)

[How dare you impugn his honor, Sir?!?! Dazai is extremely reliable! He can always be counted on to let you down.

But not, admittedly, when it comes to things that matter, and preventing a potentially dangerous situation definitely counts as one of those. If there aren't all that many more things that matter, well... you can't blame the man for having his priorities straight.

Dazai looks over at Yizhi, smiling conspiratorially. Quick(ish) on the uptake! He likes that.]


It couldn't hurt. At the very least, it should hold their attention for a while.

[And then Dazai can sneak in and take a look around, hopefully. It's worth a shot! But there are still ways to improve even such a simple plan a little, he thinks. Looking out over the river again, his expression is kind of blank, but in spite of the impression that that may give, his brain is working.]

Say there are three kappas, and we bring only two cucumbers to give them...

That should lead to some interesting conversations, shouldn't it?

[Yes, Dazai is absolutely hoping they'll fight among themselves instead of just, you know, cutting the damn cucumbers. Is that realistic? Possibly! He doesn't really know kappas beyond their legends, but if they're anything like humans, that is absolutely what would happen.]
diesuki: (173)

[personal profile] diesuki 2022-03-22 05:55 pm (UTC)(link)
(OOC: thank you so much! I really don't have enough time to make progress worth mentioning, but I have fun dicking around with it anyway, and that is... something!)

That's it exactly! [Kappa-cucumber thought experiment! Woohoo!!] We must get to know and understand our youkai compatriots, after all.

[With a flamboyant gesture, Dazai turns to follow Yizhi. It's so enthusiastic that anyone witnessing might just think Dazai is the one leading the way.]

Soon, our names will be listed alongside the likes of Pavlov and Watson!

[... That is definitely not a good thing, in addition to incredibly disrespectful to youkai, but.... what the youkai don't know can't hurt them, probably. More importantly: what the youkai don't know can't make them want to hurt Dazai and Yizhi.

Also maybe Dazai is halfway asking for Yizhi's name, but he's not planning to push it. Besides, now that he knows what Yizhi looks like, things shouldn't be hard to find out, if Dazai really cares to.

He's in a good mood, actually! So maybe he'll even pay his share of the cucumbers, like a halfway decent person would. For science~!]
diesuki: (166)

[personal profile] diesuki 2022-03-25 05:15 pm (UTC)(link)
[How dare you suggest Dazai is tipsy, good Sir!? He hasn't drunk a drop, as it happens (which is a shame), and even if he had, he's pretty damn hard to get drunk (which is... also a shame in some ways, less so in others).]

No need to worry about it, no need to worry about it~!

[... Welp, him volunteering such a thing is definitely a sign that it is something worth worrying about. But Dazai can't be bothered explaining conditioning in great detail. Besides, he doesn't especially like dogs, so the less he needs to mention those, the better.]

It's common politeness to offer your own first, you know. [But Dazai says it with a knowing smile. Maybe he's wrong about the question being deliberate, but even on the off chance it isn't, it's hard to alienate people with a smile. Either way, he doesn't wait, happy enough to offer his own name first.] I'm Dazai Osamu. And you are..?
diesuki: (233)

[personal profile] diesuki 2022-03-28 09:05 am (UTC)(link)
[One day, hell should have its very own Shamelessness Olympics, and Dazai would win all the gold medals. (Well... maybe 90% of them, anyway.)

You get no bows for sneakily avoiding giving your name (for a moment there), young man! Also, Dazai figures he's a bit older than Yizhi, even though the old-timey style makes it harder than usual to be sure: he can get away without excess politeness unless he's feeling like messing around with it, probably.]


A pleasure to meet you too, Gao-kun.

[Chinese indeed, then, or something close enough. More relevant to Dazai is that he's thinking the onomatopoeia, and imagining Yizhi as Growl-kun.

But this isn't the time to dwell on that, when they have work to do - and as much as Dazai dislikes work, he's a little interested to see how this will go. When they get to the vegetable stand, he feigns shock, grabbing for his chest rather dramatically, and generally making as if Cupid took a detour through hell just to shoot him.]


What do mine eyes see? Never did I expect to find so unique a lady working in so commonplace a location.

[Yeah, he's absolutely trying to get a discount, since he has halfway committed to paying his share. Shameless, indeed. But he's not technically lying!
... So far, anyway.]
diesuki: (173)

[personal profile] diesuki 2022-03-30 08:57 am (UTC)(link)
[It's true, Dazai is sadly lacking in the beef department. All his energy goes to his brain, not his body. Don't hate him for being smart and beautiful!!

IT IS TRUE, DAZAI IS THE BIGGEST 大灾!! What if Odasaku knew Chinese and was punning?! (Then again, what if he was simply right on every single level possible?) Meanwhile Dazai's actual name is even more fitting if you go with the Chinese meaning of the characters, holy shit... Who needs "ruling" when you can be "slaughtering livestock" or "cheating customers" instead?]


Now, now... Had I known that the lady was this lovely, I could never have doubted the quality of her wares. After all, a discerning eye in one field tends to mean a discerning eye in another.

Milady, I am in the mood to throw some friends a cucumber party. [What the jigoku is a cucumber party....] Perhaps we could get a sample?

[... Is he seriously trying to just not pay?! What a terrible excuse for a human being. But then, life is no fun if you don't push things a bit, surely? Success is too easy.]