text; un:✨🕵️GOLDEN WEEK SPECIAL RELEASE

[paperpusher]

Happy Golden Week, everyone! Natori Shuuichi here, hoping everyone is doing well-- especially our new faces! Please let us know if we can help you adjust.

I'm excited to announce that my new movie Fiance of the Funeral Procession, the second film in the Sparkling Detective Akeboshi Koutarou series, is now available in theaters! It's a historical mystery involving a beautiful woman and her beautiful fiance and the dark secrets that they keep. Each film in the series stars a new case with only the detective as the recurring character, so you don't have to have seen the first one! It would mean a lot to me if you could support my coworkers by watching the film.

Thank you and I hope you enjoy ✨

[What Natori didn't make clear is that he is playing Akeboshi Koutarou, though that becomes obvious to anyone who know what he looks like as soon as they come across a movie poster. Shockingly, this is canonically a good movie. A summary of the plot is available here! Feel free to have characters already seen posters/seen the movie if you'd like.]

Comments

text | un:majima

[no_kyouken]

Wow look at th'big movie star at work. They payin' ya a promotion commission?

[paperpusher]

I get royalties on the sales. After Tenkohime gets her cut, of course. I'm sure my agency's publicists could do much better.

[no_kyouken]

Should get ya lots of admirers at th'club too, just makin' more work for yourself.

[paperpusher]

What's that expression? Do what you love, and you'll never work a day in your life ✨

[...He supposes it's hard to convey his cheesy host tone over text, even if he defaults to using the sparkle emoji.]

Besides, it might be more work, but that just gets me closer to completing my contract, right?

[no_kyouken]

If ya say so, I hated that job. But yeah, gotta start somewhere for th'clan.

[ He'd been stuck running that club, trying to make 100 million yen so they'd maybe let him back in the clan. Then they'd made it 500 million. He had no expectation they'd ever let him back for money alone, and he doubts the contracts here will be fulfilled that way either. ]

text | un: midnightmocha

[nerine]

Whooooooa
Did Tenkohime bring your movie over to this side somehow??
Also, I don't think I was aware you were a legit actor, but here we are.

[paperpusher]

[Natori has a similar suspicion about their ability to complete the contracts, though his reasoning comes from his experiences among the exorcist community. Back home, it was the humans who forced unwilling ayakashi into contracts or tricked them into extending the terms indefinitely, but that was simply because they were the ones with the power. But those are suspicions to raise discreetly, not in public, preserved for other people to see, even if he trusted someone enough to raise it with in the first place.]

Haha, well. I suppose I just have that sort of sparkling personality! I can think of far worse jobs than getting paid to talk with beautiful people all day. Though who knows, if this movie performs well maybe some of my other work will come along next.

[paperpusher]

She did! And I've watched it with her to confirm it's the genuine article.

[Aka, Natori dissociated sitting next to Tenkohime in a dark theater as he watched himself flirt on the big screen. It was fine.]

But we shouldn't be surprised! After all, if McDonalds made its way over here, there's got to be some connections, and of course Tenkohime can make use of them when desired.

Well, don't say that until you've seen it! I might just be coasting on my pretty face.

text; un: sangria

[breweries]

Finally brave enough to forego the paperbag, I see.

[ see??? this is exactly what shylock was talking about!!! ]

How long do these films usually last? I imagine that they're as long as most human productions.

[paperpusher]

I filmed this months ago, Shylock-san. [He knows it's you cause you're hung up on that gd bag!!]

This one is about 90 minutes, which is pretty standard. Does that match your expectations for "human productions"?

text; un: UEHARA, like a day or so later

[metafictions]

I don’t usually care for Japanese movies, but I caught a showing last night to support you. And… that was really fantastic! The mystery itself was so engaging, I was on the edge of my seat the entire time.

You had an excellent performance, Natori-san. Congratulations on the release, I hope Tenko-hime can bring us all more of your films soon. ✨

[well… he's got one new fan, at least.]

[breweries]

From before you were summoned here? How curious that Tenkohime had managed to acquire a copy.

[ then again, this version of hell is close to the world natori and the other japanese charas are from, so maybe it's not so surprising after all...? ]

And yes, that should suffice. Wizard productions usually take a hundred years, so this shall be interesting to watch for myself.

[paperpusher]

Thank you, Kamui-san ✨ I appreciate you giving it a try even if it's outside your normal movie tastes! I'll be sure to tell you if any others come in.

What sort of movies do you normally watch?

[paperpusher]

It's interesting, right? It's certainly not something I had on hand when I arrived here, so she must have been able to get it from home regardless. I suppose it's just as expected!

[Read: she sure is powerful, huh. But that thought completely leaves his mind when he reads the rest of the text.]

A hundred years

As in it takes a hundred years to make or a hundred years to perform...?

[breweries]

She must be a fan of yours, in that case. And for letting us enjoy it in this very place must be quite the honor.

And yes. To be exact, there used to be an all-wizard theater troupe who would perform at the national theater of Western Country. It would take them a hundred years for rehearsals and production. One act averages about three months, and thus it would take them a whole year to finish one show.

[ so yeah they're THAT long ]

[paperpusher]

[At first, Natori was 100% going to call bullshit and say this was a bit of ayakashi teasing. But with the additional details, it fits into the sort of timeframe he expects from ayakashi; plenty of them spent years the way humans would spend hours. Really selling the whole "wizards is ayakashi" vibes there.]

I see. I suppose we really are living on different lifespans, aren't we? I hope the actors had time to rest during the performance.

Shylock-san, I know it's uncouth of me to ask, but how old are you?

[breweries]

[ fufu.

fufufufufufufu. ]

I wonder. Would you like to take a few guesses, Mr. Natori?

[paperpusher]

That's just mean. I feel like you're setting me up to say something offensive.

[breweries]

Then you should know better than to ask for someone's age, whether they be human or otherwise.

Does it matter how old I am, though? The important thing here is that we are all alive in this moment of time to be able to watch your film. Isn't it?

[nerine]

Well, I really ought to build upon my online movie playlist then
With your movie included c:
Gotta do something after the workday is done!
Are you too busy to see it together?

[paperpusher]

Haha, it's very poetic when you put it that way. But I suppose I'm just trying to get a sense of scale. When we experience life on such different timeframes, it helps to keep things in context.

[He has a lot of thoughts about this for real-- the bulk of the clashes between humans and ayakashi occur because they're such fundamentally different creatures, experiencing the same situations through different lenses. But it's because of that experience that he also thinks he's not going to get an answer out of Shylock, so.]

But you're right, it was rude of me. I guess knowing that 90 minutes to me is similar to a year to you is enough.

[paperpusher]

I'd be honored!

[and then, a few seconds later]

But just to warn you, if this is anything like going to a movie back home, we'll either need to arrive very early or right before the show starts. People tend to want to talk to you once they see you standing in front of your own movie poster.

un: gohan

[harimaya]

(He actually sat down and read all of this......)

It's a mystery?

text| un: vermillionbirdfan

[baofeng]

You’ve filmed a movie already? Congratulations, Mr. Natori!

[He doesn't know that this is a movie from home, so Yizhi assumes Natori's signed on with a movie company or something. A movie after two months is incredibly fast!]

[paperpusher]

Haha, I've filmed a couple! But all back home. This one came out a month or so before I arrived here, so I'm afraid it represents my home world more than it does this city.